Wednesday, October 24, 2012

And that's why I don't rule the world.

I haven't ran in two days and I'm currently eating banana bread for dinner. No, I don't feel bad about it. Judge if you must.

I'm feeling the pangs of why it sucks to live far away from your family. When something bad (or wonderful) happens, giving yourself a big hug just doesn't cut it. Plus it kind of makes you look like a huge loser.

A little bit like this but not really.

Yesterday morning while my stepdad was taking his and my mom's dog (Abby) for a walk, a vicious dog ran up and attacked Abby. Abby had to have emergency surgery to fix multiple puncture wounds around her neck and my stepdad, who was bitten in the hand, had to have seven shots because the dog's drunk owner took off with his dog before they could get the dog's history.

How are idiots like this allowed in this world? I've decided that before people are allowed to procreate, there should be an IQ test and if their child is in danger of being a fucktard, they shouldn't be allowed to conceive. This is probably why I'm not the ruler of the world.

I talked to my mom earlier today and referred to the guy as an asshole. And I didn't get grounded. Being an adult FTW!

Like saying "shit" without being punished.

I really wish I could be with them right now. Thankfully everyone's at home healing and MAN do I hope karma finds that douche-bag. (I've decided he's got many nicknames).

Dear Karma, do it for Abby.

Also, this morning while in a meeting my purple pen ran out of ink and AND I had to wake up and go to work today. Life is so unfair!


  1. I like you. I do.

  2. Poor Abby! I hope she recovers well. Peanut got attacked once and it took a few weeks, but then she was as good as new.

    Do you really use a purple pen in meetings? I haven't seen a purple pen since middle school :)

    1. I've got a full set of colored gel pens. It's ok. All my coworkers already know I'm not normal.

  3. Glad everyone is ok, but that is seriously scary. Is the other dog going to be put down?

  4. I call my mom an asshole sometimes and she laughs about it. I love being a grown-up. I hope Abby and your stepdad are resting comfortably and feel better soon!

  5. one time my mom referred to someone as a "douche-lord." it was awesome. I hope everyone is doing ok - I know exactly what you mean about the suckage of living far from family!

  6. I can't stand idiot asshile dog owners, hope Abby recovers quickly!

  7. I'm sorry:( I hate idiotic dog owners!! If it makes you feel any better, I sometimes wish my family lived further away:) I hope Abby and your stepdad heal ASAP and you get a new purple pen:) Virtual hug:)

  8. Oh no! I hope Abby and your dad heal quickly!!

  9. This story is just terrifying, and I feel terrible that it happened to your family. I'm glad they are doing better now. I understand the awful feeling of being far away - so frustrating! Why can't we just live in cool places and demand our family joins us?