Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Dogs fart dog farts












Things are getting real around here, my friends. Really really real. I think I've hit a limit. I don't know what that limit is called, but I think it has something to do with filtering out the crap.

Last week I made it my mission to get rid of whatever recurring expenses I could. I canceled my XM radio subscription (that I've had since 2005!) and I canceled my main gym membership. Yes, you heard that right. No more gym membership! I still have my membership at the college gym, so I can take spin and other classes, but I'm saving myself $40 a month getting rid of those two things. Oh, hello running outside, workout DVDs, and doing weights in the living room.

As you may have guessed, there is, in fact, a method to my madness. Today I submitted my application to the Community Home Trust people to hopefully get the ball rolling on finding a place for Pippi and me to live. I mean, like, our own house!

But which doormat will I choose?!













I'm not getting my hopes up (ok, yeah, I really am). I feel like I'm embarking on an adventure. Hopefully it's not a long, painful one. Cross your fingers! Also, if you have any excess furniture, small appliances, or other home-y things, I'll be taking donations :)

In closing, I'd like to discuss a very serious issue: dog farts. We all know they typically smell really bad, but often they aren't silent and those ones are the funniest.



















Last night Pippi farted and the smallest of noises came out. She whipped her head around to look at her butt and then looked at me like, "What was that?!" I think my brother has been blaming too many of his on her. Now she has a complex.

Dogs may do gross things sometimes, but it's things like these that make cleaning up after those times so worth it.

19 comments:

  1. Dog farts are awful, but it beats vomit any day. Peanut vomits when she feels ignored. It's her gift.

    Gym memberships are overrated anyway. At least when you work out at home, your dog is the only weirdo oogling you.

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    1. I wish I could work out at home - in my neighborhood I get propositioned at least 500,000 times per mile (real number). I'd take Peanut oogling me over cat-calls any day. But at least I'm clearly doing something right...

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    2. Peanut is a vomiter? That's just weird. I need to have a talk with her.

      I'm kind of excited about ONLY being oogled by my dog. Also, oogle is my new favorite verb.

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  2. Bungee rarely farts, but whenever she does, it freaks her out. Hilarious.

    Yay for getting rid of baggage!

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  3. One of our cats is the king of silent but deadly farts. Which makes him an excellent scapegoat if it's actually my fiance (90% of the time it's really him).

    Occasionally when we're out of town, he tries to blame the cat, but I have gotten wise to his sneaky and smelly ways.

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    1. My brother always blames them on the dogs. When we're not at home, he blames the "barking crickets".

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    2. My husband blames our pet duck.

      We don't have a duck.

      Awesome about getting rid of excess stuff. We did that when we moved and it's really nice. It just makes me feel so much more centered and less stressed.

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    3. LoL! Pet duck. That just made my day.

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    4. hahaha barking crickets. My husband has also referenced stepping on a duck when he lets one rip while we are walking the dog (and it's clearly not the dog).

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  4. Good luck on the whole house process thing. When my dogs fart, they freak themselves out too. The one tends to jump up like he got shot and then leaves the room.

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    Replies
    1. I just laughed out loud. Dogs are so awesome.

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  5. Delilah has jumped many times at her farts. Rufus is more of the stealthy SBD in your face type. Friggin' puggles.

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  6. Good luck with the house process and congrats on freeing yourself from your gym membership! (And any questionable characters at the gym...)

    We ditched our HDTV cable last summer and started doing Netflix streaming for $8/mo...which saves us $55/mo. and it turns out I don't really miss having 8million channels very much.

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  7. I honestly was about to email you and tell you that you forgot to include whatever photo was supposed to be at the bottom of you and Pippi snuggling or whatever that makes it "worth it". Then I realized you meant that the farts make it worth it. Um....ok.

    I am super excited for you to be a homeowner! Can we do Facetime boot camps together?

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    Replies
    1. DUH facetime bootcamps are a must!

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  8. Farting is just extra awesomeness that can't be contained. The dog just wants to share its own internal awesomeness.

    Just think of it that way, and it makes it less awkward.

    ...at least that's what I tell my wife.

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  9. I'd love to clear the excess too! Good luck with the home search!
    My dog tends to ignore her farts...but the kiddo cries just before every toot. :/

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  10. My parent's miniature chihuahua runs from his bed when he farts and then acts afraid to get back in it like it's the bed's fault he's farting!

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